Saturday is National Adoption Day, and as always, I have a lot to celebrate. I was adopted from a children’s home as a six-month-old. Both of my sisters were private adoptions. We grew up knowing that we were special because of that. Our parents chose us, and we always felt confident in their love.
My husband Alan was also adopted. His background is a little murkier. His mother never spoke of his adoption, or even admitted it. He found out in one of those soap opera moments when a relative accidently spoke out of turn.
Our most recent connection to adoption requires a little story, so sit back and relax for a few minutes. I promise you will enjoy it.
In June of 2010, Alan and I were preparing to go to bed on a Friday night. As he was shutting down his computer, he received a message on Facebook asking if he knew a certain person. Yes, he did, the person in question had been his high school girlfriend, who he’d broken up with after he’d graduated (and she was still a junior). He thought, sadly, that this may be a notification that she had passed away.
He found, after he called Lisa, the person who’d messaged him, it was nothing of the kind. Instead, she asked a few questions about the former girlfriend but never seemed to come to the point. When Alan tried to pin her down, she simply said, “you should talk to my husband.”
When John, the husband, came on the phone, he asked similar questions, without really saying what the call was about. Finally Alan said, “what is this about?”
John said, “I think you may be my dad.”
In the whirlwind weekend that followed that statement, we learned that Alan’s former girlfriend had been pregnant and never told him. He had moved away after high school, she had been sent away (it was 1968), and none of their mutual friends, even those that knew about the pregnancy, ever told him.
So, at age 62, my husband was presented with a 42-year-old son, who had been given up for adoption when he was an infant.
It gets better.
John and Lisa live in Huntington Beach, a mere two-hour drive from La Quinta where we live. They own a second home in Palm Desert, only 15 minutes away from our house. Alan used to announce the Surf City 5k on the 4th of July in Huntington Beach. John and Lisa used to participate in that race.
And it gets even better.
Alan also found out that he had two grandsons. Twins. Five years old. Instant grandpa. And grandma, of course.
Alan and I were traveling up to Ventura that weekend, so we made arrangements to drive down the coast on the way home so that we could stop and meet this “new” family. It was a wonderful meeting, and we’ve been a family ever since.
National Adoption Day
Honeymaid is sponsoring this post because they have long recognized and celebrated that while the makeup and day-to-day lives of families have evolved, the idea and importance of wholesome family connections remains the same.
The American family has changed. Today, nearly 40% of children don’t live with both biological parents. One in 12 couples in the US is inter-racial. Over 125,000 same-sex couples are raising children in the US. And more than 1.5 million American families have been touched by adoption.
Honeymaid has also evolved in its 90-year heritage, but they continue to offer wholesome products that are made with whole grains and real honey, with no high fructose corn syrup or artificial colors.
When I was little, my dad and I would get up early and he would make me my favorite breakfast, graham crackers in milk. I loved that meal, and I cherish those special moments that I had with my dad. I’m grateful to Honeymaid and this campaign for bringing this memory back to me. Next time I travel to Huntington Beach, I’m bringing a box of Honeymaid Graham Crackers to share with my grandsons.
Here’s a fun and delicious way to enjoy Honeymaid Graham Crackers with your family.
Has adoption touched your life?
I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.
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Absolutely the best!
Thanks Tiffany 🙂
Such an insane story! I’m so glad everything worked out in the end 😀
Thank you! It is pretty wild.
Wow! I remember you sharing the stories of adoption from your life. Alan’s story is truly a goosebump kind of story. Oh and graham crackers and milk? One of my fav things from childhood too!
Seriously, I’d forgotten how much I loved graham crackers in milk. It’s so good, even when it gets all mushy 🙂
Wow, Debbie! That’s such a deep story.
What a blessing to find love. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.
It’s indeed really special.
I’m so happy for you and your family. Life can take us to interesting places.
Happy Adoption Day! 🙂
Thanks Debbie. It’s been a wonderful time since they found us.
JUST WOW.
and thank you so much for sharing (and thanks to Alan) all of this with us, too.
Having chosen adoption for our family it STILL shocks me how common it was for people to find out they were adopted just as Alan did.
It happened to a friend of mine as well.
When I was young I think that my parents were the exception. I can’t even remember them telling us, we just always knew. So silly (and sad) to keep something so wonderful a secret.
How awesome is that?
No, adoption hasn’t touched my life, although it has some of my friends.
And even though I know adoption isn’t easy, I often wonder why people struggling with infertility don’t choose it more often. It really seems like such a win-win. I do get that some people desperately want biological offspring, but there are so many kids in need of parents . It’s sort of how I feel about buying an animal vs adopting a rescue, I guess.
Thank you for sharing your story!
As an adopted person I wonder the same thing. It’s such a wonderful solution.
Thank you so much for sharing this. As someone who may or may not be able to have children of my own, adopted families are just that: family.
Absolutely. I never once thought of my parents as my “adoptive parents.” They were mom and dad, just as my sisters are my sisters.
What a great story Debbie! I too was adopted at 14 days old and I’m special! 🙂 My parents started telling me through books when I was old enough to understand. I am grateful to them for being open with me.
Happy National Adoption Day! You are special.
Wow what a story! So cool and a great way to bring awareness to adoption.
It is a pretty good story isn’t is :-).
Debbie, thank you so much for sharing such a heartfelt story. How amazing that is and awesome that it has all worked out for the good.
All the best enjoying your larger family and bigger blessings.
Kathleen
Fridays Blog Booster Party #33
Thank you. It is quite a story. Even I still get goosebumps when I get to the part when John says I think you’re my dad :-).
I’m just sitting here is my mouth hanging open. That’s an incredible story. You guys have such a special family.
Thanks Laura. We do. Actually, you do, we all have special families. Sometimes we forget 🙂
What an incredible story! How awesome that you and your husband were able to embrace your new family, and just roll with it, but how sad that your husband missed out on all of those years with his son. My husband and his siblings were all adopted, and I am so thankful for him, and for his parents for choosing him.
Oh my word, Debbie. This brought tears to my eyes! Such lovely stories. My husband and I hope to become foster parents within the next year and then hopefully adopt via fostering. So I love reading adoption stories of every variety 🙂 #SundayBlogHop